We've had an eventful couple weeks. Natalie has moved to a big girl bed and has done amazingly well. She hasn't put it together that she can crawl off the end of the bed, she thinks she has to wait for the siderail to come down! I really hope she doesn't figure that out any time soon. She looks so tiny in that bed. I finally stopped tearing up every night when I check on her before I turn in. My baby has gotten so big in a blink of an eye! Then we had a nice time with the viral stomach flu. It hit like a mac truck and ended me in the hospital with some hard contractions. Once they got my stomach to stop trying to turn inside-out and got some IV fluids in me things slowed down and I was able to go home early that morning. Mommy and baby are fine. Ryan got a touch of it and Natalie didn't get any for which I am so thankful!
I'm on the homestrech as far as bedrest goes, 5 1/2 weeks, and that made me realize that we have nothing ready for this baby to come home. The nursery is crowded with everything that just get's thrown in there to sort out later and every possible baby toy/item that Natalie has outgrown. We have very little newborn clothing and I'm not even really sure where all the bottles are. For those of you who know me, I bet you are a little surprised that I didn't have everything set to go around our 12th week of pregnancy. I must say, I'm a little surprised myself, thus the ensuing panic!
So, how fitting that this weeks sermon was on worry! It really struck a chord for me. We are still studying the Sermon on the Mount and this weeks text was Matt. 6v25-27, 6v33-34. The part of that scripture that has always stuck out for me is verse 27 "Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?" That pretty much sums it up doesn't it? No matter how much I think, plan, exert my will over the future it does not one bit of good. Our pastor made this comment..."Worry is an attempt to gain control over too many things at once. All you have is this moment." All we have is the breath we take right now. The past is done and can not be changed and the future has to take care of itself. Since we aren't conscious of our breathing it was quite enlightening to just sit still and breath for a minute, to take a deep breath and let it go and feel the almost cleansing quality of it. The thought occurs to me that a newborn baby actually requires very little to come home to...shelter, food and a family that loves him. Our little man will be just fine and the nursery will come together. I still have my overwhelmed moments thinking of bringing another child into this world and caring for it and Natalie. Then I remember, I don't have a choice! What's done is done, God chose us to be the parents of Michael, he will provide all that we need to do our job. Afterall, to reference our pastor one more time, worry is a faith issue, can I trust God to provide for me? The answer is yes, and the past displays that fact over and over. What will our future hold? I don't know, but I know that I'm pretty good at taking just that next breath!
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3 comments:
GREAT post! I had heard something similar to that somewhere, that when we worry we doubt God...ouch. Thanks for posting about that!
And I liked the rant on vaccines...thats what I wanted! I dont know enough about why I wouldnt do it. I know why I would of course, but I was just curious.
If I can help you get organized I would love to help out! Just say the word!
man pregnant with the flu-- that sucks! Glad you and the little guy are ok. I, thank God, didn't get even a cold during my pregnancy. I am getting over a really bad cold-- being sick with a baby is the worst.
Worry is something God has been working on with me too. It's even harder not to worry when you're a mom.
Kara, thanks for sharing. Great post. God knows what you can handle and will give you everything you need when Michael arrives. What a blessed baby to be born into a loving family.
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